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I believe I may have scored the first 'titted' goal in the history of PESGaming FC.

I wasn't going to say anything...

No. Don't know what happened in the first game but we won the next 4, two for safety and two wins in the new season. Don't know if they stayed on after that.

Rule No.5 is no Bolton cunts

Rule No.1 is definitely the blue and green afros Ali. The gloves are No.2.

Phats don't listen to Mak - buy me some stuff about Lvl 51. My guy is fat and shit, he needs all the help he can get. It will only improve the team in the long run. That goes for anyone else about lvl 51 and has some spare coin knocking about. I'd be eternally grateful.

If I'm only at Level 51, can any of you cunts at higher levels buy me things at levels above that and give them to me? Or do I have to be at those levels already?

You are right about that particular instance Ali, I thought Sweey should have passed as well (and then I hoped you would have squared it to me once you got closer to goal, since you were at a slight angle). But I put it down to him taking his role as a winger extremely seriously, putting his...

All my pads are fucked in someway. I was playing with my newest one on Sunday and it kept changing the tactics by itself.

You missed it Ali. We won a free-kick outside the box. We knew O was going to shoot so we all rushed the keeper to try and obstruct him. But before the ball reached the keeper my guy met it on the scissor kick and scored. I could have happily snuffed it right there to preserve the moment...

I think 4231 works best with Sweey in the team, as he's probably the best crosser we have and does well down the wing.

Hoof

Accepted, I wondered what that was. What's your PSN ID? Up to 23 now. Dare we make 25?

It's alright lads, I return tonight, so we should score no goals whatsoever.

What the fuck happened? Must have been because I wasn't on.

So close to getting the money shot...

But not unwarranted.

Sweey did you happen to get a photo of me stabbing Ali in the neck?

It was beyond bollocks last night. 90 MINUTES I tried to get in, and when I finally did, it took me to the opening sequence with Lamar, despite recognizing the money in my bank account. It's embarrassingly wank. They need to sort their lives out.

I want to be on for about 8:30ish. Should give me a couple of hours before MOTD