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With a giraffe's neck, and a Nifty tendancy to drugs. :D

Cheryl sent me her picture today, and, in compliance with the rules, I am forwarding it to this thread: Ever since she got onto the crack, Cheryl's TV career has plumetted downhill

C'mon now Mutu, you know the rules. Taken from The Official-ish Rule-scrap-paper (there was no book available, they all had this strange "story" stuff in them), circa 1999, repr. 2017: 47. (ii) If one does behold a photographic image of oneself then one is to post it on a public thread...

Bitch, please! I wouldn't pick you if you had an affro. Speaking of picks - which we weren't, but anywho - yes, I will go out with thee. The reason they all think I'm great is due to the wonderful extravagance the human mind possesses - it's ability at performing this act is second-to-none...

You could argue that Rio shouldn't have 92, though, as his tackling isn't that good. I've given Rio around 83 in my game (though that particular example is irrelevant now, Rio's been removed from all squads).

Mutu, don't kid yourself or others - football will never be for women and men on a level playing field. I'm not saying that I wouldn't want it to be - but it won't be. Women are built in a way that they're not good at it - OK, so the bird that signed for Perugia might be half-decent, but her...

You don't not? So you do, then? You wash dishes, hoover, and cook (unless your mum's out, in which case you go hungry?). Double-negatives. Don't you just love 'em?

What a stereotypical view, Flipper. They come in handy for other things, too, y'know. Like ironing.

Greetings from PESInsight. You sound like an intelligent bloke (the Cambridge and computer designer bit). Hope you find any information you require on here. :)

You're female, right? It's alright, you've already raced ahead of 98% of the female population by single-handedly turning the computer on, with no help whatsoever from your father/spouse. PES3 is indeed a footy game. Zygalski is indeed a pimp. A synthetic grass pimp. It's like Mahatma...

Not a footwork stat, but a footwork "technique." Rather like the Free Kick styles, A-E, you could have Footwork Technique A-E. Amazing!

They should bring back the "Sliding" special ability as well. An attribute for decision-making would be good, too. I'd call it "Decisions." Similar (well, identical) to the Championship Manager one in function, how often the player makes the "right" decision when on the ball, or making a run...

In my current ML team, it's Marcus Allback. Don't ask me why, but he's just got the beating of defenders in the air. If you're wondering why I've got Allback, it's because I've had enough of "big" players - I've already got one superstar team.

You're basically looking at having the Championship Manager stats. The problem is programming them all to have an influence on the player - instead of having 24 different things affecting one player, there'd be 50. The amount of stats/attributes is endless, you can always think of this or that.

Albert Luque Preferred Foot: Right Attack - 87 Defence - 39 Balance - 74 Stamina - 82 Top Speed - 84 Acceleration - 88 Response - 72 Agility - 87 Dribble Accuracy - 84 Dribble Speed - 83 Short Pass Accuracy - 77 Short Pass Speed - 75 Long Pass Accuracy - 71 Long Pass Speed -...

Adolfo Bautista Attack - 79 Defence - 39 Balance - 87 Stamina - 77 Top Speed - 87 Acceleration - 79 Response - 78 Agility - 72 Dribble Accuracy - 72 Dribble Speed - 74 Short Pass Accuracy - 64 Short Pass Speed - 64 Long Pass Accuracy - 58 Long Pass Speed - 63 Shot Accuracy -...

Composure's the one I've always wanted to see in a football game. At present, "Control" is just re-named "Technique," to all intents 'n' purposes. Imagination/Vision/Creativity has to make an appearance. How well a player can spot the defence-unlocking pass that will wrong-foot a...

Welcome to the fora, Nick. We prefer avoiding the use of "txtspk" as it's harder on the eye and makes for more annoyance/less understanding. *insert some sort of witty comment here, as Nifty's feeling out of form and can't think of one at the present moment*

Check in this thread for a number of Appearances/Abilities for the two. My ones are the best (obviously), but there are various renditions of the players. NOTE: That thread contains Anthony Le Tallec's appearance before he got the stupid blonde mop on his head, so use one of the more recent...

Why don't you have a bash at it yourself? You might surprise yourself, and turn out to be the new Robinho (forum member, not footballer). Failing that, you can always make separate requests for particular players/teams/squads, but you have to tell us exactly who the players are, and if you...